Big Red purchased his super lotto ticket from his local 7-11 store after a long hot day working in the Florida sun. The grand prize was 76 million dollars. What he didn’t know was by Saturday evening that Florida State Lottery ticket would change his life forever.

     Big Red was tall burly man with ZZ Top anvil red beard, sooty white t-shirt, and worn-out overalls. Big Red was just downright mean and nasty. He was the kind of man that makes Satan smile. Everyone in his town knew who he was and stayed clear of him. However, there were three biker chicks with sailor mouths that loved tough guys and found Big Red attractive. Big Red was a biker too. He loved his Harley Davidson Fat Boy. With his Florida State Lottery ticket in his overall chest pocket, he fired up the Fat Boy and roared six miles down the winding highway to his favorite watering saloon, The Gator Hole. Conscious Candy, Big Berta and Mary Anne were already there waiting for Big Red. All three ladies were smoking Camel cigarettes and had four long necks Budweiser; three for them, and one for Big Red.

            Big Red pulled up a seat next to Conscious Candy. All three ladies noticed he had something sticking out of his overall pocket. “What the bleep you got in your pocket Big Red?” says Big Bertha. “Oh, just a bleeping lotto ticket hoping my bleeping luck will change” says Big Red as he sets a flame to his Marlboro and snatches that cold one out of Mary Anne’s hand. After about six or seven beers apiece along with several shots of whiskey, Big Red let out a loud belch and told the ladies he was calling it a night. He had to get up and work the next morning at 5am.

            Saturday morning came and Big Red slept right through his alarm set for AC/DC’s Hells’ Bells. Noon time came as he just rolled right out of his rack. He checked his phone messages and found that his boss left him a message saying not to bother coming. His days with Taxidermy Unlimited are over.

            A few hours later, Conscious Candy, Big Bertha and Mary Anne showed up with their Harley Hogs and talked Big Red into a ride up to The Gator Hole. The TV was on and the winning lotto numbers were about to be drawn. The game host announced “the grand prize for today’s drawing is $76 million dollars and 6, 19, 78, 23, 45, 06 are you winning numbers”. Big Red checked his ticket and checked again, he mutters “I think I won”. Conscious Candy snatches the ticket out of Big Red’s massive hands and checks the numbers again. She screams out “You won Big Red! You Won! Now everyone in the bar heard that Big Red won and people immediately started buying him round after round hoping to gain his favor and word started spreading around town that Big Red won the $76 million dollar Florida State Lottery.

Big Red arrived at the Florida State Lottery Office as soon as they opened at 8am Monday morning. What his people didn’t know but should have expected was that Big Red had no intention of sharing any of it, not with the biker girls or even with his own mother. He signed his ticket, claimed his money, and purchased a new 2011 Harley Davidson VRSC motorcycle with black and gold trim and disappeared out of site. There were rumors swirling that he and his money are hidden away up in the Smokey Mountains, but his property is protected ten fierce dogs, shotguns and even a few grenades on hand. No one has been brave enough to contact him.

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