Are you ready to go out and catch the big one? Fishing is fun and relaxing. Fishermen like to swap tales from time to time. They also appreciate a good joke. Here are some fortune cookie sayings from a fisherman.

1.   You can steal a base, but never steal my bass.

2.   Never call a fisherman Tuna Face unless you want to be used as live bait.

3.   Get some backbone.  Otherwise, people will just call you a worm.

4.   Shout it out. I caught a trout!

5.   Never name your baby girl Marlin.  It sounds too fishy.

6.   Just because your best friend is Sal, it doesn’t mean he likes to eat salmon.

7.   If you smell like a dead fish, please take a shower ASAP. Otherwise, expect a cold shoulder from your wife.

8.   Patience is a virtual.  When you go fishing, it’s a necessity.

9.   Never tell your girlfriend that she looks like a fish. She just might return the compliment and call you a shrimp.

10. Never carpet your floor with dead carp.

Image by tpholland via Flickr