I lasted about ten minutes and happened to be speaking to a client when suddenly my throat clamped down and became like a desert and I tasted ashes in my mouth instead of saliva.  The coughing fit hit so fast I didn’t have the time to tell the caller and muted the woman which was fine because she was babbling incoherently, unfortunately she seemed to know the difference between mute and hold as she listened to her own echo.

When the client didn’t get an answer to her question she called out a few times but after about half a minute she began to cuss and tell the company how much she hated us – she obviously knew every call is recorded.  She finally hung up but I continued to hack and cough as my head expanded in pressure with each miserable spasm, somehow, in the back ground I heard the supervisors phone ring again.  I was 2 for 0 today, next time I’ll just tell them my name is Peaches.

My co-workers had just about enough of me and instead of offering assistance, they giggled at my misfortune while throwing tissue packs and bottled water into my cell (a.k.a the cube of misery).  I guess I better make sure never to choke on food unless I can do a self – Heimlich because I now know my coworkers would probably video it and put it on the Internet rather than help me out.  Jerks!

I regained my composure and after the shaking fit allowed my fingers to type again, I began taking calls.  By this time I was completely unable to breath through my nose, which made my ‘phone voice’ sound as if I had a permanent speech impediment but it was workable until my body finally rebelled and for some unknown reason I began crying out of my one good eye and I could no longer see my computer screen through the watering.

I finally gave up and went home, the drive was hell and I almost had an accident but once inside my apartment I was miraculously able to breath again and my sight improved.  It was amazing, as if removing myself from my workplace had removed most of the pain and misery, hmm…

So, I grabbed my keys and headed to the theatre – why waste a miracle?  A few minutes into the movie I thought I might be in trouble as my eye watered again – nope – it’s just a sappy story and I found myself once again crying out of my one good eye.