Charlie looked into the sky, a worried expression on her face. “I don’t handle flying well,” she thought. “Maybe I shouldn’t go…”

It was a crisp morning. Louise, the happy camper, consoled Charlie. “I’m sure you’ll do just fine, Charlie. You had your problems the first time but like I say, you can always improve in the future. Nothing to worry about. Maybe you should try the peace pipe. It’s an American institution.”

Charlie squinted her eyes and held them shut. They piled into the vehicle and began to move. As soon as the vehicle left the ground Charlie started screaming uncontrollably.

Man Chung laughed in the front and looked back at Charlie. “It’s really Okay. We’re not going to get hurt.”

Paul laughed. Louise tried to shut Charlie up but had no luck. “She really doesn’t like flying,” Louise shrugged. She looked out the window and began to muse. “I shouldn’t have chosen philosophy as my major. This type of thing doesn’t bother me. But Charlie? Panic Central. I know. You’re probably thinking, why does a philosophy major from Kansas keep it together while a cute little girl named Charlie loses it at profound levels.” She lit her peace pipe and pondered a new, profound issue. “Charlie, don’t lose it.”

Charlie continued to scream.

“I can see why the Native Americans left Asia. I went to China,” Louise continued. “They really hated the peace pipe for some inexplicable reason. Tried to explain it and got three days in jail. What a crock! The Pipe is beautiful. You smoke it, you toke it, and it doesn’t bite back. You ever had a hangover after smokin’ The Pipe? Nay, I say. Nay. Smoke and toke. No bite. Got that Man Chung?”

Man Chung sat quietly and quelled his laughter. He shut his eyes and turned his head from side to side.

Paul grinned. “We’re all going to die,” he said to Chung.

“Hopefully not,” Chung replied.

Louise continued. “’Ya know, I’m really on an intellectual roll here. Paul, are you aware that the U.S. Department of Energy Conservation, Population Happiness, and Bureaucrat Management for a Better Future has posted revised regulations on this sort of activity?”

“What activity?” Paul replied.

“Use of a Peace Pipe and Booze to Quell the Delirious Screams of a Young Woman in a Super-Duper Vehicle,” Louise explained. She took a long smoke and then explained. “You see, Paul, the U.S. government has an interest in regulating… when it comes to broads who can’t keep it together in a Super-Duper vehicle of this type, i.e., Charlie… Various international regulatory bodies have provided further advice and insight on this growing issue. To wit, you should never give booze to a delirious broad aboard a Super-Duper vehicle. Got that Man Chung?”