I spent three and a half years listening to my ex-husband tell me repeatedly I was fat, ugly, stupid, useless and inadequate.  I certainly beg to differ.  Though I do have to admit it took me a very long time to shake these words out of my head.  In fact, they are still in there when I have moments of weakness and feel lost and low or down.  It is an ongoing war sometimes to get these voices to SHUT UP!  Since I was married to him when I was 18 and I am now 39 you can maybe see how long it can take to heal your own heart and hurts.

These are my opinions and expressions of lessons I have learned in life that have helped me SHUT the voices UP.

FAT

Well, yes I am.  So what?  More of me to love! 

I have and am never going to be a little girl.  Too bad.  I’m round and cuddly.  I really don’t hear my friends complaining when they hug me.  I’m sure regardless of my size they, my children and other family members feel my love for them.  I have spent far too long hating myself because I am not one of those drop-dead gorgeous, thin model type girls.  Again I say, so what?  I don’t think God intended us to all be the same size or else all our bodies would be built exactly the same and there would be no need for variety in our DNA strands.

I own it. I am fat. So what? I am also cuddly, loveable, sweet, sexy, intelligent, capable and many more wonderful things.

It is about darn time that voice in my head that makes me feel bad for not being a skinny girl should SHUT UP!

UGLY

Hmmm, well I believe beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

If you behold me ugly, that’s your opinion.  I have come to understand that many people will.  

However, many other people will see in me varying degrees of attractiveness depending on who they are and what they prefer.  Each of us can be many things to many people so if I’m not beautiful to everyone that’s ok. What I need to do is learn to accept and appreciate my own beauty to myself.  The rest will follow.