Her name was Kathleen. She was 15 years of age and was in her seventh foster home. She walked up to the podium calmly and confidently. She politely brushed some of her dangling hair from her face as she spoke rather eloquently about herself. She had been waiting for an adoptive family for over 10 years. As she spoke about her foster experience and future goals, a woman rose from her chair and asked Kathleen, “You are about three years from being on your own. Why would you want to be adopted now?”

The question seemed rather legitimate. Many faces in the room seemed to agree. Kathleen smiled and looked at the woman without skipping a beat, “Because when I graduate high school, eveyone’s parents will be running toward their children to hug them and congratulate them. I want the same thing. Ten months later, a Christian family without children adopted Kathleen after hearing her story. Three years later, they were there to give Kathleen a hug and congratulate her on her graduation day.

Kathleen’s story had a happy ending. However, many children wait for years without getting adoptive parents. There are three things that I would like to address in this article about adopting children that are older than what you might be seeking right now:

Fears: Fear is naturally felt between the child and the adoptive parents. For the child, it is a fear of the unknown. Am I going to be alone all my life? Is there a family that wants me? For some children, especially in sibling groups, this fear actually multiplies. How many adoptive families do you know are out seeking a large sibling group to adopt? In fact, most prospective families really only want an infant.

For the parents, there is a fear of failure. What if we are not good enough? What about our own children? What if we knock our own children out of the pecking order by selecting children older than they are? To eliminate this concern, it is wise for an adoptive family to sit down and talk this out.

Tears: Children in foster homes are under tremendous stress. Our society today does not offer them much chance of success because quite honestly, we are hesitant to take a child in without knowing their entire story. You look at how delayed these children are because of their life history and it is tough for them to excel in life. However, many of these children are resilient! President Clinton was adopted. Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy’s was adopted. 100% of these children are in this situation that they did not create. Rather, they are a victim of some tragic situation or poor choices made by parents. In some countries, especially as we have heard in Haiti, of families giving up their children because they know their chances of a decent life are improved.

Years: It is unfortunate but many children go throughout their childhood without parents. We have failed them. When a child is not adopted, they feel anger and resentment at not only their parents but the government. Imagine awaiting for help that never comes. Many parents have considered adoption and thought about adoption but never made that life-altering decision to pursue the wonderful process of adoption. If you choose to adopt a child today, consider yourselves doing God’s great work. He loves it when we extend our hand to the poor and to the orphan. Adoption does not happen over night. It is a long, hard process that will when the love and support of a lonely child! Consider adoption today!