You broke a girls heart. You left her for another girl. Now you are going to pay. Here are five choice Valentines from your ex-girlfriends.

Valentine dear Valentine

You really broke my heart.

So Valentine dear Valentine

May you rot in hell from the smell

Of my eternal, stinky fart.

You cheated on me Valentine

And then you dumped me

Like a sack of potatoes.

So I’m enclosing with this Valentine

Some chunks of rotten tomatoes.

Dear Valentine I hate your guts.

I hope they splatter on the floor.

I used to be sweet and kind,

But now I’m into bloody gore.

Dear Valentine you have no honor.

You’re a liar and a cheat.

You’re also fat and ugly,

And you have enormous feet.

You bled me of all my money.

It was not easy to digest.

So I’m giving you a present dear Valentine:

An audit from the IRS.