How you deal with compliments says a lot about your self esteem

                 There was a time when I could not deal with compliments. I would blush, look away or stare in the faces of those that are always insulting me for any ounce of confirmation or dissent. I wanted to know how they felt about the compliment that I was receiving. When I responded it would be self deprecating and demure, trying to subtlety hint to the complimentor that I am “not all that”. In the same breadth I am more prone to accept criticism than I am to embrace praise.

                     Sometimes compliments embarrassed me instead of enlivening my spirits. I wished the ground would open and take me in. I was afraid of compliments and unable to respond to good critique because I had a low self esteem. I had a substandard perception of my own individual worth. I did not see what others saw in me because I was too busy paying attention to the few people that did not approve of me. The few people whose opinions I validated did not care about what I thought about them. I did not realize that I was good enough just as I was; I was preoccupied with what others said about me than what was really true.

                 You cannot learn to accept a compliment if you think you do not deserve it. If you think you are a mere cat, and someone claims you have the speed of a cheetah.  You will not accept the compliment because you cannot see the speed in you.

                    It is simply, if you believe in your self worth, you will believe in others. If you have faith in your capabilities then you will find it easier to believe that you are capable of anything and concede when others show faith in you.

                                Today’s world is filled with opinions and people are finding it increasing difficult to protect their individualism against the influence of the growing second persons’ perspective.  It is difficult to tell yourself that you are a cheetah when everyone around you is clamoring that you are a cat. But if you are aware of your innate capacities and how important it is for you to be true to yourself then you will know that you can accept a compliment without feeling bad or mortified. 

                              NB: Remember you should only claim that you are a cheetah if you have the commensurate speed to support it. We are conscious of the narcissism that today’s society breeds when we tell people to feel and congratulate themselves for qualities they do not possess in the name of building self esteem and then we end up with arrogance and conceit.