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“My Life is an Open Book”

dbtyon on Jan 21, 2010
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Personal blog…

    Sunday, January 17, 2010

    Looking back over the past several years, I think, man I’ve come a long way (at least mentally, tha is).  My divorce was final July 31st, 2008 – almost a year and a half now!  2009 was a long year, but passed quickly enough and I am glad to see it gone. 

    It looks like we are now losing the house.  The bank bought it back at foreclosure on January 5th this year & it doesn’t look like they want to sell it back to me.  So be it then.  Thinking now, it might be time to move further South.  Checking out our options at this time – we have about a month to do something. 

    Still striving to keep the animal rescue going… life-long callings are hard to give up.  Feeding the kritters is getting expensive tho – and we don’t have the money – the feed store is running us a tab.  Hopefully, I can pay them for it before too much longer.  I hate owing money to anyone, but it’s for the animals, so I’ll do it.  God puts them in my hands, so I will do what I can, as long as I possibly can.

    I worked the past two summers, as a lifeguard for Hawaiian Falls (a local water park) and this pastt summer, slipped and fell, landing on my left knee – my already disabled leg, messed up again.  I’ve been on worker’s comp for the past six months and still in treatment – still having alot of trouble and occasional pain in my knee, even after surgery.  Sucks, being in this situation again – recovering… always recovering.  But still believe, this too, shall pass.  My life has been a soap opera… even more unbelievable than some.

    Almost a year ago I wrote: 

    Starting Over, Again… Wednesday, January 9, 2008

    It was two years ago, today, that my husband first told me he wanted to leave me.  After making love that night, he rolled over and jokingly said “you’re going to miss me when I’m gone.”  He giggled and squeezed me.  So I responded, “you’d miss me more.”  Not really considering the fact that he said “when” he was gone…not if… we were laying, as we often did – my backside snuggled up against his belly, his arms wrapped around me, enveloping me fully.  There was a time that I could have stayed like that forever and been happy, knowing he wanted me there.

    That next morning, I awoke to find him staring at the ceiling.  And with a smile, I asked, “so you still thinking about leaving?”  (Expecting to hear ‘of course not’.)  “Yeah,” he replied.  The smile quickly left my face and I sat straight up… “are you serious?” I asked – “yeah”, was all he said again.  “You really want to leave?” I questioned, once more, not believe what I was hearing.  He simply said, “yeah”.

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