i have built my life on lies,but to you i tell nothing but the truth,here i sit just 4 days from hearing the news,that you may be gone forever,alone am i always now,with the words of your sister and mother burning inside my mind “you have ruined his future” says your mother. “you are just some girl,i dont care about you,you cant be trusted”yet they do not give me time to tell them that i was not i who spread such lies.no…..yet your sister questions my love for you asking me why i did what i did…………i cry i scream i fight.i tell her that i did not mean to hurt you,but i did hurt you,and thats all she cares about,no matter if it was unintended,i feel as tho everyone has turned on me,and even tho i have our friends,Link and Ariel and ur brothers.i feel so alone so very cold,because i thought i ment something to your family,because i ment something to you,but it is clear that that was just an illusion,and that with your absence i see i am a traitor of sorts,a vial lieing betraying beast.i have yet had the chance to earn your mother and sisters trust but they will not give me it now,they jumped to the conclusion that it was me,but i am telling you i would never do those things,never accuse you of the things that i was accused of saying you did.
no one knows this,but i wish the numbness that encased my heart the moment i heard the news,had stayed….instead it has left me with a dead feeling.i am not safe from the ones im supposed to be loved and protected by.i see every stare of hate,i hear every whisper,as they all assume i am not in love with you.no one knows that i go home and sit in my room and blast loud music to scatter my thoughts,no one knows i have gained five pounds since i heard the news,no one knows how pathetic i am at night,still curling up in bed with your shirt,sometimes even wearing it because it smells just as it did when you gave it to me……