YES SIFU, WE WERE WONDERING THAT: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!

It simple Laui; you Sifu have been in hiding. Yes, hiding in the sewers of him dirty mind. You see, Laui, evil enemy ninja discover you Sifu secret sewer base (in London, near River Thames, just in sight of Big Ben). That right; evil enemy ninja invade, try to assassinate you Sifu! Many of him Sifu loyal Yellow Lotus World Domination Society Ninjas fight back; epic ninja nunchuks battle ensue in sewers beneath London (do not heed television propaganda lies about maintenance work on underground; what make all that noise for three days was many hundred nunchuks-warriors locked in mortal combat).

Meanwhile, you Sifu is escape; loyal ninja of Yellow Lotus World Domination Society is lay down them lives while you Sifu is make him getaway.

SO… YOU RAN AWAY?

Not a bit of it, Laui; you Sifu is never run! Him is walk briskly, him is hurry a bit and maybe even hustle, but him is never run. You Sifu is make tactical withdrawal to emergency back-up secret hilltop base in St Albans (near to cathedral and shops). There, you Sifu is plot to raise new ninja army by introduce mind-control drug into local water supply. But, terrible disaster; water supply in St Albans already contaminate with strange crazygenic substance, make all people in that town insane! That right, Laui; all people there suffer from dangerous crazy-eye!

SO YOU DIDN’T TAKE OVER THE TOWN?

Hell no, Laui, them people is nuts! You Sifu is decamp to distant north of England, only to discover that cities there are overrun with insidious Shinobi Tramps led by the evil Dimak Jack; again, epic ninja battle ensue, only this time you Sifu have no loyal Yellow Lotus World Domination Society ninja to help him! So you Sifu is fight him way south, through endless army of Shinobi Tramps. So many enemy Shinobi, you ninja is wear out him nunchuks and have to improvise weapons from tree bark and poison squirrels. Fortunately, you Sifu is able to reach him second secret back-up base, which is totally secret, where he had previously stashed marvellous weather machine for controlling the weather; under cover of ferocious weather machine induced blizzard, you Sifu is escape again.

SO WHERE ARE YOU NOW, SIFU?

That is secret, Laui; you Sifu is not so foolish to let him new base be discover so quickly, hah, no! All you Laui out there need to know is that you Sifu is back, and that THE WORLD WILL HEAR FROM ME AGAIN!