Teddy has been coming home from school lately looking a bit down, confused, and perhaps even sad about something.  He’s kind of tight-lipped about it so I left him alone till he felt ready to tell me what’s on his mind.  Sure enough, the day came without warning and with a question:

Teddy: Master, what is forgiveness?

Sebastian: It’s the willingness of a person to overlook and forget a hurtful wrong done to that person by another.  Why?

Teddy: Well, I had a fight with a friend at school the other day.  I felt betrayed.  All I can think of was how to get back at him for what he did. But after a while though, and with a cooler head, I started thinking about the meaning of forgiveness and whether it was worth the effort of getting him back.  Forgiveness felt really hard to do at the moment: it didn’t seem to make much sense.

Sebastian: Friends will do that from time to time, but revenge is not the way out of your frustration, forgiveness is.

Teddy: What the hell is so dam special about forgiveness anyway!  I mean, I hear enough about it but I still don’t get it.

Sebastian: Forgiveness allows you to grow as a human being, to outgrow the pettiness of vindictiveness, and it also lets you forget about the harm done to you.  It is the power you have to look at the other person as if nothing ever happened.  Question is, do you have that caliber strength of spirit, that renewed force of character, that would enable you to supersede the inadequacy of the other?  Do you have the kind of courage to face your pride and deny it?

Teddy: But Master, what good is forgiveness if there’s no forgetting?

Sebastian: Your refusal to forget will inevitably be your downfall.  If you don’t forget you don’t forgive, and as a consequence, your bitterness will flourish.  You will always carry the memory of your hurt like a ball and chain fettered to your feet, but does that memory set you free to be a better person?  Let your insight guide your wisdom Teddy.  You must live your life as if it was your last day in the world; only then will you be at peace with yourself and with your choices for living.  Be eager to show the formidable power of forgiveness, and stop learning from the misguided experiences of others.  Turn to your heart more often and dare it to speak to you.

Teddy listened, and for a moment, he thought he heard the voice of his father…