I was raised in a Catholic family. I have an uncle who is a Franciscan priest and another uncle who was studying to become a Jesuit, until he met and married my aunt. I wouldn’t say I had a strict Catholic upbringing, as my Mother fell away from the church when her marriage ended. This was both a blessing and a curse. A curse as it was hard to get up for church when staying with friends and relatives and when I was young it was easy to feel confused when going to mass.  I mean, when do you stand, when do you sit, is this mass ever going to be over? 

On the other hand it was a blessing. Because we didn’t go to church religiously, no pun intended, it opened up our minds to possibilities of many other faiths. We got to experience the differences in people and lifestyles and cultures. My mom didn’t care what religion or faith we became as long as we were good people. 

As I got older and had children, I circled back to Catholicism and gave my own kids a foundation in faith. But the more I went back to church the more I had a hard time agreeing with a lot of what they said and what they expected of their followers.  I am a divorced mother of two boys. I often felt like an outsider because of my divorce. Many of the rules made no sense to me and wonder how they would apply in everyday life.  My ex-husband went to the same church as myself, along with his wife and son. He is a good person, so is his wife and son, but because he takes communion without our marriage being annulled, that is a mortal sin? I know confusing and a little bit crazy right? Are you trying to tell me, a good person is going to damnation because they took communion when their marriage wasn’t annulled and they are actually going to church and want to take communion? 

Then the Archdiocese in my state of Minnesota put out a DVD that they proclaimed is being sent to every Catholic in the state. The DVD boasted about how marriage should only be between a man and a woman.  That put an end to my confusion as a Catholic, as I didn’t want to be one anymore.  How can I be a part of any faith, which oppresses the civil liberties of any group of people? 

I am a straight divorced woman, and I am a lot of things, but not narrow minded.  I was taught at a very early age that the greatest gift God could give us was love.  I looked in every faith book I own and not one of them had an asterisk sign next to this statement commenting that Gods love was only meant for straight people, who marry only once, to the opposite sex.  Nope I believe it says he loves everyone. I don’t believe God makes mistakes. I don’t believe being gay is a lifestyle choice. I believe it is just small part of who some people happen to be. Like being smart or having a quick wit.   

I have plenty of gay friends and plenty of straight friends as well. They are not much different than each other.  They are kind, giving and caring people, and that is how I judge them. I would like to believe that is how God judges them too, and someday, well someday, I would like to go to all their weddings as well.