Chapter 1: The Beginning of Something

Apparently something happened once, but no one knows what so for all intensive purposes, there was nothing once, then there was something, everyone, who was no one then was happy, although they weren’t sure they were since it was only nothing, they, being no one, were apparently comparing something to. Something more than nothing existed from that time onwards and it gave things stuff to do. Mostly inhabiting space, which of course is largely nothing, so there was lots of room for nothing to happen and in extreme cases slightly less than nothing.

This is the story of how nothing became something: something more than nothing but not more than everything

Although no one was around to witness the start of something it can be said the start was certainly exciting. Slowly but surely the Somethiverse was created somehow, again, if this wasn’t clear, no one knows how, however some people have some pretty wild theories on the subject. In the Somethiverse which is derived from the Nothingness there exist many planets and stars, sometimes they bump into each other and cause interesting things to happen. The planet in question within this story is the planet Nothania located within the Hapless system of the Somethiverse. Life, not as we know it started to evolve one day after Nothania had cooled down after a huge interesting event had finished happening. A collection of different molecules, mostly hydrogen and oxygen managed to cling together and drifted near an open volcano, little did the molecules know, by getting close to the volcano they ended up getting heated up to the point of vaporisation and never existed together as the same molecule again for quite some time. Fortunately other molecules had found the sea, which had somehow formed on a recent lava planet. The sea had a collection of other molecules within it which liked oxygen and hydrogen, so much so that they were invited to live within the sea, since they shared a lot in common, it was later that salt was allowed to stay. The molecules all had a big party every night, some say, largely drunk, that the waves in the sea are a result of the banging parties the molecules have every night and day.

Some of the molecules began to get tired of all the parties and decided to hide in the softened rock at the bottom of the sea, little did they know within the rock were harder molecules. The rock molecules took advantage of the softer ones, eventually managing to get their way with them they became bonded together and created something slightly bigger and intelligent. This battle of softer and harder molecules went on for some time, some different slightly bigger and more intelligent things were created and bopped around in the sea, which was only too happy to have them for company, for a little while longer until they got bored of the sea’s childish jokes. The slightly bigger and intelligent things decided to have a look around elsewhere, this is where some were taken away by the wind onto land, where they eventually made trees and other green things, some were taken away by aliens who had nothing better to do and thought the high brow entertainment the slightly bigger and intelligent things was worth keeping around before disappearing into another dimension where things were obviously far more advanced than the Somethiverse. Other bigger and intelligent things bobbed around on top of the sea, since it was comfy there and eventually grew so fat they became even bigger, but not much more intelligent, this is apparently where the first fish type things came from, not many people know that, so keep it under your hat.

You can pretty much see where this ended up many thousands of years later when the things started to change…