These “getting-to-know-someone “services” just totally blows my mind.
We see someone who is appealing to us and we can’t wait to say hi!
We read their profile and they say they want friendship, dating, serious
relationship and they have the courage to truly love again. Everyone
that I have talked with has a broken heart, they want so much to mend.
We write and maybe even send a smiley face and go all out and click
on a heart that gives that person “some love” enough for a week or so.
Now that act takes bravery, and is a temporary high. We usually get
some electronic love back and then we exchange a couple of lines,

“You’re so handsome, you’re so pretty…” and then we sign our real
name next to Tiger Woman or Tarzan. Our heart has been so dead
and it feels weird but good to come alive a little. We feel a rush! We
know we have made a connection…it might not be true love, but it
will do. Like a turtle that has been tightly concealed in our shell, we
dare to stick our head out and share our emotional person and tell
ourself, “I have arrived!” Then, everything stops, deader than a door
nail. Our breathing becomes shallow and we have a difficult time
exhaling. Feel a tinge of hyperventilating….sorta dizzy and crazy.

The largest elephant in the jungle could not get another word out
that person,. You look on the site and see (your hard earned
lover to be) was on the site (4 hours ago), and OMG, he did not
answer your six messages. You know when to hold them and
when to fold them and when to run, but you do the good deed
thing and go that extra mile (that has to count for something) and
try contacting them “one more time” with an apology that you did
not mean to appear so lonely or needy. In your guts you know
it’s over and you wonder what you did wrong. You wonder, but
know damn good and well, you’ll never know. Never in this life.

There is something so hurtful your heart actually palpitates,
to start the long process of going back into your shell, but it
has got to be done. It is not a good feeling, but it is a familiar
feeling. It is not how we want it to be…it is what we know.
Then, a man becomes an island…desolate and dead.
Were we created to be this way? How did we get this way?
Should I stay in my shell or go to another dating site?
Oh, the tangled webs we weave…………………by CHOICE.

@2011 Roses In The Rain Pub./Nashville, TN
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