I loathe Rupert Murdoch. I wish to see his tabloid media empire crumble into dust. But when the non-tabloid media, the lesser-tabloid media, and the government seem to actually be doing their job, if you’re going to distract us with a prank, please make it worthy of our time.

Why a foam pie? What’s offensive about that? I know I wouldn’t mind being hit with a shaving-foam pie. I’d just laugh it off, and pretend like I needed to shave anyway. If you really want to show contempt for someone, hit him with a pie made of dogshit. A dogshit pie really gets the point across. The fact that it takes some effort on your part to collect enough dogshit to fill a pie, and that you will have to deal with the smell of dogshit as you carry the pie to its target, and that you will probably get a bit of dogshit on yourself in the process of hurling it at the targeted individual, shows that you stand by your convictions. A foam pie is light, childish comedy. Grow up. Adults throw dogshit pie.

I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that the worst invective you could muster to hurl at Murdoch along with your choice of pie was “You naughty billionaire”.  For throwing a steaming hot dogshit pie, the appropriate verbal accompaniment “Eat shit, Murdoch!” is what’s required, and I’m not sure that you could pull that off. From your mouth, it would probably come out like this: “Dog poo in your face! hee hee!”

You claim in your Guardian article that you didn’t do it because you wanted more Twitter followers. However, by mentioning that you have a Twitter account, what else do you expect to happen? So then, your excuse is you did it “for all the people who couldn’t”? Who are these people exactly, your imaginary friends?

Please leave this to the professionals and go back to Twitter, you twit.

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  • Finsbury72 on Jul 21, 2011

    This is the greatest article in the history of the cosmos. This is so awesome that I’m typing this in a James Earl Jones voice.

  • ImKarn23 on Aug 12, 2011

    loved it!

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