The Canadian RCMP are investigating the suspicious death of noncelebrity author Bo Jack Russo.
The RCMP (that’s Royal Canadian Mounted Police) have not yet released a statement about the tragic death of author, poet, and former Pirate King Bo Jack Russo, late of San Diego, California. They are treating the death as a homicide, considering the bizarre circumstance that an American citizen would be caught dead in Canada in January.
Russo’s mangled body was found in the women’s restroom of the Tim Horton’s coffee shop in Calgary, Alberta; at approximately 3:00 am (Tim Horton’s coffee shops are open 24/7 and always guarantee fresh coffee). Cause of death has not been determined, but it would appear that he died of massive blood loss. His entire body was covered in what appear to be cat scratches.
One detail that RCMP statesman Corporal Rex Philanthrofeline released to the news media was that a paper printout of an email sent to a B. Nelson from a Becky Russo was found stuffed in the victim’s mouth. The paper was badly damaged and completely illegible so a computer data recovery specialist Onlywaytobesure was brought in to assist in the investigation. Within eight seconds, Mr. Tobesure uncovered a string of emails sent back and forth from the computer of B. Nelson to a user in Russo’s own home. The communications revealed that two females who apparently lived in Russo’s home, Becky and Jessie had contacted Nelson and complained that Russo was not cleaning the litter box often enough, and they were both getting tired of holding it. A third female in the Russo household known only as K was interviewed by the RCMP and she collaborated the accusation about the neglected litter box, but denied any involvement in either the emails or the death of Bo Jack Russo.
Canadian CSI personnel are expected to have the evidence report ready by June 1, 2011. Charges may be levied at that time, but for now no arrests have been made.
Mourbidity and Humor rolled into one, great work Karen, Bo is in the headlines a lot these days….hmm..
Bo,Karen,and B you all three are characters to say the least, triond would not be the same otherwise.
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