First and foremost, expectations are always so high and they’re never met. As you get older, you need more out of life. A doll isn’t going to be enough anymore, it’s not going to make you happy when you have a job you hate and a mortgage you can’t pay off. When you were little, all your dreams could come true on your birthday and it’s a day full of joy. But now, there’s so much on your mind, there’s no way a few presents and good intentions will distract you from the weight of the world that’s on your shoulders.

Plus, aging used to be a cause for celebration – at 13 you were becoming a teenager, at 18 you could see R rated movies. But at 22? 36? 45? There are hardly any milestones left, only the bad ones, like 50 and 100. You’re losing your innocence, there aren’t any new experiences any more, the only gifts you get are responsibilities, disillusionment and wrinkles. You’re not getting hotter or happier, just droopy and sick. So many diseases increase as you get older, you’re really on the downward slide toward diabetes, cardiovascular disease and dementia. You’re either closer to having kids or losing your kids as they grow up and move out. Your loved ones will start deteriorating around you and there are less voicing singing happy birthday every year.

Besides, as time goes on, the world moves faster and further away from the one you remember. There’ll be a new kind of iPhone you won’t be able to afford, and even bigger TV you’ll never see, more street violence than ever before and the ever increasing mantle of fear that surrounds modern day society. The days left are decreasing and you remember how little you’ve accomplished. Even though you promise you’ll turn things around, are you ever actually going to take the plunge?

Each year there are less relatives to see, less friends to catch up with – people move away, pass away, lose touch and lose interest in you. People stop partying in your name and start celebrating the fact that you’re still alive. Every year we get weaker, more tired, less inclined to celebrate at all.

Lol, depressing article, huh? Next, I’m planning on writing articles about how awful puppies and rainbows are