Won’t a tail  be as useful as your hand?

          One intelligent  father-monkey  told his precocious  son that monkeys in  general   are  far superior to Man because they have one additional body part, that is,  a tail, which the humans don’t have.

          At times I wonder why our Lord God had deleted the tail from our design specifications. Won’t it be a very useful and valuable limb to perform many activities particularly for men.

          Say you are reading something and a fly does keep hovering  around you.  Instead of using your hand to chase it away, you could use the tail for the same purpose while you go on with your reading  job or eating job uninterrupted.  Some time your little son or grandson would love to come and  pinch you or disturb you  in some way  when you are trying to have an afternoon nap on an easy chair.   The tail who should be awake at that time  could shoo him away.

           The tail could be your security guard as well against pick pockets  during your bus journey.  It could give the thief a mighty whack if he puts his hand into your pocket.

            In summer time, especially during the ‘dog days’ when you walk in the Sun, your tail could act as your fan and keep your free from sweating besides of course warding off  the  insects and leaves etc..

            God’s design features should include coiling the thing  when not  required and insert it inside a pouch (like the pouch of a kangaroo)somewhere  inside your trousers so that you don’t feel embarrassed to walk about among women  or attending a social party or a dance session.  Women may not like to see your long tail, (which could be anywhere  between three and six feet) flying about  in the air behind  your back or over your head. I mean, women shouldn’t feel inferior to you being tail less themselves!  

            If some software engineer could work out a suitable programme to make it  perform a variety of jobs,  it would turn out to be a wonderful live robot. All you have to do is put on switch No. 6 and it could tickle a woman  in her hips sitting four feet away.  She would turn around and yell, “sometime touched me”  .  “Who, who?” her chaperone would stand up in order to catch the eavesdropper. Mean time your tail should withdraw from the scene and get into its pouch inside your trousers.

           One of the  programmes could also be to write a standard undictated letter with a pen;  or, if another tail  dare venture out to play tricks on you,  to hand fight with it and  teach a lesson to it in some way. You know something like two fighter cocks battling with each other.

             It should be possible to switch it over to the  ‘manual’ mode from the automatic whenever necessary.

             Would some god-man kindly communicate this idea to the Creator God ?