There is one in every class.

Tuesday Morning.

Oral Communication.

Not only is it too early for proper brain function,

but I am especially pissed this morning.

I scratched one of my Redman Cd’s, yay.

Two hours before I walked through the door

I was on my way back from Choctaw Casino, Pocola, Ok.

I lost $280 on the BJ tables. That’s what I get for playing

with dipshits who hit a 15 on the dealers 6 showing.

The idiot busts with 25, Dealer draws a 5 on his 16 and

now everyone is fucking pissed.

For some reason I always share every

class with at least one person that

drives me fucking crazy. Maybe it’s my fault(It’s not)

Well in oral communication, Katie is the prime annoyance.

She weighs a good 400 lbs, her face maintains a cherry-red

color, and unfortunately she speaks.

Our professor often asked questions out loud,

in order to get multiple opinions from the mouths

of brain-less students in my class.

One of his questions was “Ladies, if

He shows up at 7:30 instead of 7:00, is

the date still on?”

The females begin to chirp and grunt and

pretend like they wouldn’t put up with that.

(But pulling up at 7:30 never affected the

usual outcome for me.)

But as I ignore the flustered hens

one voice cannot be ignored.

It sounds like rotten spam sizzling

in a bath lard and Crisco.


“He better just turn the car around and pray

I don’t find another date.”

It always took a moment for my brain to

accommodate her remarks.

Could this creature truly be serious?

The only man she found at her door

was the pizza boy.

I never liked liars, and I knew the only

date Katie ever waited on was 10 cent wing


Not a man.

Her face was so bloated it disguised her

age. I guessed that she was between 19 and

38. Not that I gave a fuck.

Her lips were always sloppy in appearance and

wet with droll.

I’m sure this was due to the lip-licking

mid-class New China day-dreams.

Another typical Tuesday shut-the-fuck-up

moment occurred when Katie attempted to relate

to other girls in the class. Ha.

One of the skinny/sexy girls in the

room would rant about how cheap her man was.

“Oh God…Tell me about it.”Katie would say.

(Somebody would have to tell you about it

Katie, for you have NO idea what the sexy

Chic is talking about.)

Why Katie acted so hard to please I don’t

Know. Even the cheapest man would afford

the dollar menu.

I never did reveal my true feelings to Katie.

It would have been a waste of breath.

She thought she was hot shit, all sassy

and such.

How I did want to question this creature.

But I figured… like her appetite, her feelings of

self-value could not be spoiled.

For Katie had the perfect life.

Either she fantasized about having

a significant other, or, realized

she would never have to worry about

who gets the last slice of pizza.

Liked it
  • Honesty on Mar 22, 2010

    This is great!

  • Netty net on Apr 29, 2010

    I guess you really angry about something when you wrote this,

  • Netty net on Apr 29, 2010

    I guess you really angry about something when you wrote this.

  • Top English on Jun 25, 2010

    Some common thoughts shared in poetic way.

  • ashybaby87 on Nov 10, 2010

    look on my new article.

  • herbert carrington on Jan 16, 2011

    I found your article very amusing. If it was’ nt for the fact that you are talking about a real person I could laugh with you on that. I am not trying to get on your case or anything but with your intellect and your vision you could write some outstanding articles. Do not waste your time on the small fish go for the big prize. You have what it takes to be great at writing. I wrote The Last Love Letter. I am not as ballz as you are about Kate.

  • Fred Matthews on Jan 26, 2011

    I liked this poem. It is almost catty and I liked the honesty. And there are some really funny moments here. ‘Fat’ don’t bode well with a lot of people. As Herbert Carrington says, try something…….different?

  • Apostle of Flamboyancy on May 30, 2011

    Awesome verses…

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